Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
