i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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