And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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