i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
