I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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