i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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