i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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