At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Randomize