Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
You pole danced in your parka.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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