I just cut my nipple shaving
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Pooping to opera.
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