When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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