We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
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