i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize
