I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
