True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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