She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
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