My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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