Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
