stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Randomize
