summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize