smell my finger.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
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