would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Randomize
