Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
