if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
