I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
