I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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