Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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