Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Nobody cheats on THIS.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
