Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize