I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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