You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
