Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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