so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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