How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
