Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
