Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Randomize
