Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
