have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
should my penis look like a turkey
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize