I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Randomize