I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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