what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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