How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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