Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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