Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
mondays should just be called national damage control day
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
