are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
NoShamevember. You game?
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
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