Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
