I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
