Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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