Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I just gift wrapped bread.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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