What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Randomize
