If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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